Mourning the Demise of a Mam: Strategies for Daughters to Cope

Mourning the Demise of a Mother: Strategies for Daughters to Cope Effectively

Losing a mother is a profound and life-altering experience. It can bring about a myriad of emotions, from regret for lost family traditions and cultural knowledge, to feelings of emptiness, rage, and sadness. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.), these emotions are normal in the year following parental loss.

Grief is not just an emotional journey; it can also impact physical health. Studies have linked grief to increased chances of cancer, cardiac issues, immune disorders, and high blood pressure. It's crucial to take care of both mental and physical health during this time.

Managing grief can be a challenging task. Mindfulness, the ability to focus on the moment and not follow thoughts down an emotional path, can help manage painful memories. Focusing on happy reminders such as pictures, books, or keepsakes can provide comfort during the grieving process.

Losing a mother can mean losing an important part of your support system. Local support groups, online chat forums, and mental health professionals can provide assistance during this difficult time. Offering support to others who have experienced parental loss can also become an important part of someone's journey with grief.

Honoring a mother's memory can take many forms. Some choose to donate to her favourite charity or achieve a personal goal she always wanted. Books like "Healing After the Loss of Your Mother," "Motherless Daughters," and "How to Survive the Loss of a Parent" may offer guidance during the grieving process.

It's important to remember that everyone's experience with grief is unique. Some people may require the support of a mental health professional. If extreme grief persists for over a year or daily tasks become difficult, it may be beneficial to seek help.

If you're experiencing overwhelming grief or considering self-harm or suicide, help is available right now. In the US, you can reach out to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, Crisis Text Line, or Befrienders Worldwide.

Grief after losing a mother can have more negative effects on daughters than on sons. A 2015 study found that women have a more intense grief response and more difficulty adjusting to the loss of a parent. Women who experience the loss of a mother are more likely to binge drink, have a greater decline in self-esteem, and have a lower level of personal mastery. A 2021 study found that parental loss is linked with depression and a compromised sense of self in young adults.

Maternal support can come from various figures in one's life, even if not biologically related. The story of Lola, the eldest daughter grappling with the sudden death of her mother in "Die Wut, die bleibt" by Mareike Fallwickl, offers a highly emotional yet authentic perspective on grief and the importance of support.

In conclusion, navigating grief after losing a mother is a journey filled with challenges, but it's also a journey of healing and growth. By seeking support, honouring memories, and focusing on self-care, it's possible to find a path towards healing.